One of the things we get asked most often when we teach people to Go for No is…
How do you get over the fear?
In 1519, Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez landed on the shores of the Yucatan to conquer the area. Cortez was serious and had to motivate his crew to get behind this colossal task. He told his men before they ventured off into battle, “Burn the ships!”
Of course, the men weren’t crazy about the idea since there would be no way to go home now that they’d destroyed the ships. It did however mean that they had to be successful, and they were committed to the plan.
Back to fear.
Master the “process” of the fear.
What is the PROCESS OF FEAR?
You’ve been afraid a number of times in your life, you’ll recognize this pattern.
First, it’s physiological.
The process of physical upset (racing heartbeat, sweating, shaking) plus the emotional distress and anxiety is basically the old fight or flight syndrome built into humans for as long as we’ve been on the planet.
Second, it’s psychological.
Your brain will spin its inner dialog: “This is not a good idea. You don’t know what you’re doing. This is a mistake. You are not safe.”
The way you counteract these two processes is by taking action. Emerson said, “Do the thing, and you shall have the power.” When you do the thing that you fear (taking the action) it is like pulling back the curtain and revealing the wizard. You see what’s really going on. You discover who the wizard is and it turns out it’s been you all along.
Mason Cooley said, “Fear of trying causes paralysis. Trying causes only trembling and sweating.”
The key is this: being willing to experience the physiological and psychological manifestations of fear understanding that they will be relatively short-lived and that you can out-think and out-act them.
1… When you literally start feeling the fear… breathe. A count of 1-5 in, and slowly a count of 1-5 back out. Recognize your body is under stress. This is completely normal, this reaction is built into your DNA so you’re hardwired for it. Feel the sensations but don’t let them stop you. Move to your thoughts.
2…. When you start thinking fearful thoughts… shut them down with your mind… and do the thing anyway. Ask the tough question. Go for No!
Last thing that’s really helpful when it comes to fear. Back to commitment.
It helps when you’ve committed to something. You have something you’re trying to accomplish, you set a goal to achieve XYZ. Without that, it’s easy to give in to the fear. Why not? What’s it all for?? You’ve got to get to the place where staying where you are is no longer an option.
Create a new vision and commit to that. Keep the promise you made to yourself. Commit to doing the actions that will pull you toward your vision and burn your ships! There is no turning back now!
Want to listen to our parable The Fear Factory, visit Audible. Have you read Go for No! yet? Pick up a copy today!